- Eat produce at the grocery store and don’t pay for it.
- Gamble with the rent money.
- Record over a borrowed vcr tape
- Tell people that they are in your will, even if they aren’t.
- When giving out directions, leave out a turn or two.
- Don’t make up your mind.
- Improve your posture by walking with your nose in the air.
- Remind people who lose their job that they should work harder.
- Comment on the weight gain of others.
- Keep a pile of wisecracks for tense and serious situations.
- Answer a question with a question.
- See what it takes for the lifeguard to blow the whistle.
- Add the straw that breaks the camels back.
- Practice pulling the wool over people’s faces.
- Put a title like Senator or Doctor before your name when making dinner or hotel reservations.
- Don’t volunteer for the back seat and never take the middle one.
- Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.
- Put off until tomorrow whatever you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Spot test “Wet Paint” signs.
- Underline in other peoples books.
- If you can’t think of something nice, say something nasty.
- Take the labels off of unopened cans.
- Put a rude message on someone elses answering machine.
- Leave your underwear in the sink.
- Chew other peoples pencils.
- Support the death penalty for parking tickets.
- Get a backseat drivers license.
- Repeat yourself.
- Repeat yourself.
- Use the whole can of starter fluid on the charcoal.
- Put things back where they don’t belong.
- Have belching contests in restaurants.
- Make the same mistake twice.
- Get up on the wrong side of bed.
- Glue a chip on your shoulder.
- Put salt in sugar containers.
- Blow out other peoples birthday candles.
- Cut off people in the middle of their sentences.