{"id":2445,"date":"2007-12-30T16:52:33","date_gmt":"2007-12-30T22:52:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.conradaskland.com\/blog\/2007\/12\/oliver-stone-joins-rebel-hostage-rescue-team\/"},"modified":"2007-12-30T16:57:54","modified_gmt":"2007-12-30T22:57:54","slug":"oliver-stone-joins-rebel-hostage-rescue-team","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/oliver-stone-joins-rebel-hostage-rescue-team\/","title":{"rendered":"Oliver Stone joins rebel hostage rescue team"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2007\/12\/oliver-stone.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2007\/12\/oliver-stone.jpg\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Director Oliver Stone is in Colombia as part of a mission to retrieve hostages held by the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, or FARC.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;The FARC really needs a lot of help,&#8221; he said in an interview with AP. &#8220;Their wardrobe and make-up is ghastly, totally  unbelievable for an organization like this.&#8221; When asked if the writers&#8217; strike had any play in his intervention Mr. Stone replied, &#8220;Absolutely. They need better writers. There are no jokes in their delivery, no physical comedy and nowhere in their run has a pie ever been thrown.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>A representative for Mr. Stone who wishes to remain anonymous confirmed that Jerry Seinfeld and David Letterman were in negotiations to be on the writing team. &#8220;They need to keep their plots within 30 minutes including commercials so we can get some TV time on the networks for their cause and reach a wider audience.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Unconfirmed reports from reliable sources say Dustin Diamond, &#8220;Skreech&#8221; from Saved By The Bell, is currently doing screen tests to play the rebel leader. &#8220;He brings a cozy warm hearted front to the FARC that they desperately need&#8221;, the source said.<\/p>\n<p>Music producer Conrad Askland has already started scoring for the project. &#8220;We&#8217;re doing the whole soundtrack on a $200 Casio keyboard using the auto-chord feature&#8221;, he said. &#8220;We want this project to be realistic, lo-fi and in your face. To add the to realism, all the music will be recorded in black and white&#8221;, he said from his recording studio while sitting suggestively next to a lava lamp.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;They have 30 seconds to give me a plot pitch,&#8221; said Stone while sitting with Askland drinking hot cocoa using only the miniature marshmallows with lava lamp nearby. &#8220;And it better be good.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Director Oliver Stone is in Colombia as part of a mission to retrieve hostages held by the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, or FARC. &#8220;The FARC really needs a lot of help,&#8221; he said in an interview with AP. &#8220;Their wardrobe and make-up is ghastly, totally unbelievable for an organization like this.&#8221; When asked if [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3C0LX-Dr","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2445"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2445"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2445\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2445"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2445"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2445"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}