{"id":2609,"date":"2008-02-26T18:38:01","date_gmt":"2008-02-27T00:38:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.conradaskland.com\/blog\/2008\/02\/kids-in-church\/"},"modified":"2008-03-10T17:29:18","modified_gmt":"2008-03-10T23:29:18","slug":"kids-in-church","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/kids-in-church\/","title":{"rendered":"Kids in Church"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Kind of like when Bill Cosby does those interviews with kids &#8211; here a collection of some church jokes, or kid&#8217;s takes on church. It&#8217;s ok to laugh.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3-year-old, Reese:<\/strong><br \/>\n&#8220;Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p><strong>A little boy was overheard praying:<\/strong><br \/>\n&#8220;Lord, if you can&#8217;t make me a better boy, don&#8217;t worry about it. I&#8217;m having a real good time like I am.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>After the christening of his baby brother in church<\/strong>, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, &#8220;That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord&#8217;s Prayer<\/strong> for several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end of the prayer:<br \/>\n&#8220;Lead us not into temptation,&#8221; she prayed, &#8220;but deliver us some E-mail.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>One particular four-year-old prayed<\/strong>, &#8220;And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>A Sunday school teacher asked her children<\/strong>, as they were on the way to church service,<br \/>\n&#8220;And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?&#8221;<br \/>\nOne bright little girl replied, &#8220;Because a lot of people are sleeping.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons<\/strong>, Kevin, 5 and Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. &#8220;If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, &#8216;Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'&#8221;<br \/>\nKevin turned to his younger brother and said, &#8220;Ryan, you be Jesus!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>A father was at the beach with his children<\/strong> when the four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in the sand.<br \/>\n&#8220;Daddy, what happened to him?&#8221; the son asked.<br \/>\n&#8220;He died and went to Heaven,&#8221; the Dad replied.<br \/>\nThe boy thought a moment and then said,<br \/>\n&#8220;Did God throw him back down?&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Kind of like when Bill Cosby does those interviews with kids &#8211; here a collection of some church jokes, or kid&#8217;s takes on church. It&#8217;s ok to laugh. 3-year-old, Reese: &#8220;Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,2],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3C0LX-G5","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2609"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2609"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2609\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2609"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2609"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/conradaskland.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2609"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}